The Survival Mom™ » Moms

INSTANT SURVIVAL TIP: “Don’t make me tell you again!”

thesurvivalmom — Tue, 21 Feb 2012 19:04:42 +0000

“This is the third time I’ve told you to take out the trash!”

“How many times do I have to tell you??”

“If I have to tell you one more time…”

image from graph-jam,

I always swore I’d never make statements like that as a mom, but of course I have. However, I’ve realized that in a crisis, I will need their immediate and focused attention and obedience. Here are two strategies I’ve used to train them to do this

I noticed that the tone of my voice is pivotal to quick obedience. I generally have a very soft voice, and if you’ve heard any of my radio shows, you know that! I sometimes wonder if that makes it easier for my kids to ignore my directions and requests. So, what I’ve done is train them to recognize the difference in my everyday tone of voice and the one I would use in an emergency. I did this by demonstrating different tones of voice from, “Please empty the dishwasher,” to “Get out of the road NOW!” The key is instantaneous obedience. Rising flood waters just isn’t a good time for a kid to yawn and say, “Yeah, yeah. In a minute, MOM!”
If a situation ever arises when a gun may be fired in our home, say in the event of a home invasion, I don’t want to worry about my kids being in the line of fire. If I’m the one armed and ready to protect my brood, hesitating just for a second could mean the difference between life and death for all of us. My kids know all about gun safety, so what I did was to sit down with them and explain how important it was for them to be out of the line of fire if an armed and dangerous person is ever in or near our home. Here’s what the are to do: drop to the ground immediately and without question. To rehearse this, on occasion I’ll yell, “Kids! Drop to the floor!” or just, “Kids! Drop!” Then, I check to make sure that wherever they are, they’ve dropped! I know, I know. It might sound crazy, but what’s crazier? Having innocent kids wandering around in a lethal situation or training them ahead of time to avoid danger?

By the way, I started teaching this to my kids when they were 8 and 10 years-old. The only reason I didn’t teach it earlier, is because I didn’t think of it!

Here’s what some people on the Survival Mom Facebook page have to say about this topic:

From Prudent Pantry: I am blessed with 5 kids, 4 of them have autism. I herd cats for a living BUT I have a special mommy voice that I use ONLY in emergencies that everyone attends to. I draw a clear line between hurry up we need to go to church and the house is burning down get out.

From Andrea Lynch: This is weird, but we have a sort of code word for our kids that means “this is for real, listen up.” Thought it might come in handy.

Wabi Sabi, A Different Way of Seeing

thesurvivalmom — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 18:25:43 +0000

Guest post by Liz Long

image by Liz Long

Wabi Sabi is a Japanese concept that just may help you get through life with a little more joy and a little less stress. This isn’t about buying things or learning a skill you can show others. It’s about a mindset.

I learned a little about it when I bought the children’s book, Wabi Sabi. The idea interested me, so I bought the grown up book Living Wabi Sabi. It doesn’t translate exactly but it is about appreciating the beauty in imperfection. If you can manage to live wabi sabi, it is easier (not necessarily easy, but easier) to accept when things go wrong, or fall apart completely.

How does this relate to prepping? I find that if you accept imperfection, it is much easier to try new things. No one is perfect the first time you try something. It takes practice, and patience. I will never be a gourmet cook but that doesn’t mean I can’t make any foods well. To my shock (and my husband’s – we aren’t newlyweds), my tortillas aren’t bad. An elderly Mexican woman would probably look at me pityingly, but my family isn’t that picky. We had lumpy ebelskiver (pancake puffs, As Seen On TV) with the filling barely inside the second time I made them – no need to discuss the first try. They tasted good, but looked weird. Next time, they’ll be even better. I could have left my worry that I would suck keep me from even trying anything more than box mixes, but I decided to try something new, no matter what the results.

image by Liz Long

Not being perfect, or even within shouting distance of it, is no reason to avoid trying something. You can love doing something you suck at, and you can hate doing something you’re great at. Don’t let your fear of failure or lack of skill keep you from trying! Just because I sing so badly that my cat has left the room in disgust doesn’t mean I should stop singing. (It does, however, mean I should sing very quietly in public and never, ever join a choir.) My general ignorance has not kept me from starting to garden. I just took classes, read books, and went online to learn about it.

Wabi sabi means appreciating that your chipped tooth (or your child’s) is a reminder of falling out of a tree. There is no reason to rush out to get it ground down to “perfect.” It means enjoying the wildflowers that grew where you didn’t expect them to, a dead tree lying across a stream, and the site of the snow melt running down a hillside. It also means savoring the imperfections that come from handmade items, whether it’s the rough texture of a clay tea pot, the bubbles in blown glass, or the unevenness of something hand knit.

image by Liz Long

A dead tree covered in fungus lying across a tiny stream sounds, well, kind of gross, but if you look at it, it is really a lovely part of the scenery. The fungus is oddly beautiful in its own right and the light color contrasts with the dark bark. It is far from perfect, and yet that is what makes it worth looking at. Would a perfectly plain, perfectly round, perfectly clean concrete pipe in the same location be worth looking at? I don’t think it would be half as interesting.

Does it matter if your herbs and vegetables get all mixed up and aren’t in neat rows? Does it matter if your “tortillas” look more like pancakes because they’re so thick? Does it matter if your loved one gets a small stack of presents, or even just one, on their birthday if they get what they really want?

Does it matter if your kids plant the garden seeds and they are all mixed up instead of being in neat rows? Does it really need to be perfect, or is good enough really good enough?

To be clear, wabi sabi definitely is not an excuse for slovenliness, but it is a much more relaxed world-view. Some things do need to be perfect or darn close to it. Can you imagine if the plumber almost finished your whole-house re-pipe or the doctor read half your chart? But for the rest of it, can’t we all use a little less to worry about, and a little more to enjoy?

A few brief words about fear

thesurvivalmom — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 10:09:08 +0000

Courage is not the lack of fear but the ability to face it.”
—- Lt. John B. Putnam Jr. (1921-1944)

Fear gets a bad rap. As little children we’re told, “Don’t be afraid.” The worst possible insult for a young boy is being called, “scaredy cat.” And yet, if it weren’t for a bit of fear, how many men would voluntarily go to the doctor for a prostate exam? Fear of being fired from a job pushes us out of a warm bed on a cold, dark morning. It’s that little bit of fear that says, “If I don’t do what I fear, maybe something worse will happen.” Very often, it’s fear that

image by Jimee, Jackie, Tom & Asha

prods us into taking helpful and positive action.

When you read the headlines, and there have been some doozies lately, you’ve probably felt fear. The future of America, and our families, has never been less secure, and the world seems to be coming apart, from Europe to the Middle East. But if you’re reading this blog, no doubt you faced that fear, looked it in the eye, and said, “I’m going to do everything in my power to provide for, protect, and nurture my family.”

What you’re full of is courage, not fear.

I’m not saying that I never feel fear. I do, and on a regular basis. But it’s not the feeling of fear that’s harmful. It’s wallowing in it. Refusing to get out of bed in the morning; neglecting home, family, and responsibilities because you’re frozen in a cowering position.

Survival Moms do not cower! We feel the fear, let it settle in, knowing it’s just a temporary visitor, and then brush it off. Once we’re past the fear, we can dangle it in front of us, look it over, analyze it, and then take action. Our kids, husbands, and other loved ones deserve a strong Survival Mom, and just in case you’ve been feeling that maybe you’re not quite measuring up, trust me. You’re doing just fine.

You know what to do. Even the smallest baby steps add up over time to significant measures, each step bringing your family closer to being prepared for whatever comes.

Dear Survival Moms: Can you help Shelly?

thesurvivalmom — Tue, 11 Oct 2011 20:41:13 +0000

It’s not unusual that I get panicked emails from other moms, and sometimes dads. They feel as though time is running out to be prepared for an uncertain future that might include food shortages, increased natural disasters, societal chaos, and just about every other trouble imaginable. Last week I heard from a reader I’ll call Shelly, and since I believe that all of us together are stronger than just one of us, I wanted to pass along her email and call for help. Can you provide Shelly with tips and encouragement?

I am mostly concerned because I am a disabled mom of 5 ages 9 to 23- one of which is also challenged with aspergers syndrome. I am truly feeling panic because my financial situation is pretty dire. I do not have very much at the end of each month to put into storage and preparedness even though I feel significant pressure to get it together not today but yesterday! Any ideas or suggestions for me as a newbie? I need to get caught up ASAP!

I’ll be posting my own thoughts and suggestions, but I know that together we can help Shelly and other moms in a similar situation.

Inquiring minds: Questions from a Survival Mom

thesurvivalmom — Mon, 22 Aug 2011 10:08:39 +0000

image by tj scenes

Thanks to S.T., a reader who submitted these questions. I think they’re the type of thing most every Survival Mom wonders but then gets too busy to ask! This is the nitty-gritty stuff that we’ll all want to know, sooner or later!

Q: Is it okay to plan on a charcoal bar-b-cue as a back up stove? Charcoal would be easy to store, I could handle it on my own, and it wouldn’t evaporate from non use like gas. I am going to buy the sun oven, but what if I want eggs or grits?

A: Absolutely, but I would suggesting going a step farther and getting a dual-fuel stove than can burn both charcoal and wood. That way, if/when you run out of charcoal, which is easy to store, you’ll still have the option of burning wood, which is generally easy to come by and safe to store. In addition to something like the Ecozoom Rocket Stove, I recommend the purchase of a good quality solar cooker or one that you make yourself.

Q: I know that my beloved Calphalon stainless steel would not last on a bar-b-cue, open fire, or whatever. I saw some affordable iron pots and pans under the “Lodge” name at Wal-mart. My grandmother and mom used to use iron pans for biscuits and really tender steaks. Would they hold up to “survival cooking”??

A: The main problem with using cookware over a fire is that it’s difficult to maintain a steady temperature. You can certainly use your regular pots and pans over a fire, but if they have a non-stick surface, you’ll need to be very careful the pan doesn’t overheat. When overheated (above 500 degrees Fahrenheit), the non-stick finish can begin to deteriorate and give off noxious fumes. Inexpensive, thin metal pots and pans work well but need to be closely monitored to avoid scorching food. Cast iron cookware is probably your best bet. You can read more here about its use and care.

image by particlem

Q: What about cooking utensils? I guess I could still use my wooden spoons, but what are the best to use for spatulas, forks, etc. Bar-b-cue stuff?

A: Make sure your utensils have long handles in case you find yourself cooking over an outdoor stove or campfire. Other than that, plan on using whatever you have on hand. You’ll need long-handled spoons (including slotted spoons), spatulas, turning forks, tongs, and a ladle. Check out the Pigtail Food Flipper for a nice option!

Q: What type of coffee pot? I adore my expresso maker, but assuming there won’t be electricity (at least in the short run). I will need my coffee!! I hate instant, so please don’t go there. My grinder is electric, so I need to know if they make hand grinders for coffee.

A: Yes, you can find hand-grinders online. As far as a coffee pot goes, track down the old-fashioned percolating kind! I have an old one I found at a yard sale, and even though I don’t like coffee, it’s useful for heating up water and other liquids. I could also use it for heating up soup and then pouring it out of the spout into bowls. Here’s a bit more info about storing coffee for the hard-core coffee lover!

Q: Are Rubbermaid containers okay to store food in? Like packaged pastas, or flour, or coffee beans, etc. I keep my food stores in my house, in the bedroom on storage shelves from Ikea. The Rubbermaids, of which I must own 40, fit nicely on the shelves. It shares space with my sewing, so it is a constant temperature year round.

A: Hmmm….think about the enemies of food storage, and then you decide whether or not your Rubbermaid containers are doing the best job possible: heat, oxygen, pests, humidity/moisture, and light. Any of these will begin causing food to loose flavor, texture, and nutrition. Check out small mylar bags as a better alternative. Store smaller amounts of food in the bags, your coffee, for example, and then use the Rubbermaid containers to store like food items. You don’t mention how large the containers are, but they will also be very useful for storing non-food items, such as toiletries, soap, small tools, sewing supplies, etc.

image by epSos.de

Q: I know this will be a hard question, but how much cash is good to have on hand? I have thought of $3600. That is 3 months rent for me, or if we are in such bad shape that the owner doesn’t care about the rent, I can live for awhile knowing that if I have to, I can buy gas or food if it is to be had.

A: There isn’t a one-size-fits-all answer to this question, but I recommend having enough cash to cover expenses for at least a month. That would include fuel, mortgage/rent, utilities, fresh food (to supplement what you have stored), and payment for hired help. Remember, that even during the Great Depression, banks insisted on being paid, and if utility companies are operating, they’ll require payment as well.

Camp MAMA!

thesurvivalmom — Thu, 30 Jun 2011 22:40:59 +0000

Guest post by Liz Long.

image by Lin Pernille Photography

Summer vacation is starting – soon! Summer camp can be hundreds of dollars a week. As great as those experiences can be and as much as kids can learn, it can quickly add up to too much money. My boys are signed up for some camps, mostly half day, and definitely not an entire summer’s worth. That leaves a lot of time for them to drive me insane and get really bored. My plan? Trading kids! Really. I’m going to give my five year old to another mom and take her nine year old for some afternoons throughout the summer. She has sons the same age as my boys, so they will all have friends their age to hang out with.

I’m going to use things I have bought and stuck in a closet to give them little “camps” at my house with different themes. Whenever there is something appropriate (like building forts – aka shelters – in the wood), we can have all the kids play together for “camp.”

I plan to use the three Survival Challenge books by Claire Llewellyn to design part of it. These are focused on outdoor survival skills, albeit in situations my kids are unlikely to ever really encounter. It doesn’t matter, though, that they can’t use giant jungle leaves to build a shelter (“Survive in the Jungle”) if they figure out how to make one using what is available in the woods near us. Likewise, learning how to make a solar still as described in “Survive at Sea” is good knowledge even though we are in a land-locked area where they will not need to know how to care for a jellyfish sting. I don’t expect to go fishing, but we may try making a fishing net from an old t-shirt (“Survive on a Desert Island”) to catch tadpoles. (For tadpoles, I plan on using old baby shirts.)

With a travel theme, a “Mexico” week could include making tortillas and an evasive NERF course for learning to evade a hail of bullets. Politically insensitive, no doubt, but I have boys and boys love NERF. A “London” camp could include acting out a play like you’re at Globe’s Theater, building your own bomb shelter (fort!) like many WWII era books and movies include (Narnia and Bedknobs and Broomsticks, for instance), or designing your own royal wedding and wardrobe.

image by e pants

Cooking could include outdoor cooking, no-cook cooking, baking, dehydrating (and rehydrating), and cake decorating. (My boys love baking because they can eat what they bake.) Spy Camp could include treasure hunts, pre-packaged murder mysteries like the dinner party kits, an evasive bike-riding course, and more NERF. I bought the “whodunit? lab” from Discovery Kids (crime lab experiments including fingerprinting) and will use that for one week. It’s out of production but I found it on eBay.

Other possibilities include cooking, cake decorating (“Ace of Cakes”!), working on cub scouts pins, photography, crafts like weaving and spinning, wood working, and gardening. The choices are limited only by your imagination and the skills you know or are interested in learning.

Summer Camps are great, and they definitely provide sanity breaks if you’re home full-time with your kids, but doing your own Camp Mama (or Papa or Grandparent) allows you to teach your kids specific skills, cater to their interests, and share something you love with your kids. I’m a poor swimmer at my best, so sending the kids to swim camp instead of trying to teach them myself is a no-brainer, but the whodunit? lab looked wicked cool and we never have time to try it during the school year, so doing that as a camp is equally a no-brainer. And of course, they’ll need plenty of time to just kick back, relax, have some Wii tournaments with their friends, and enjoy their free time during summer vacation. With a little luck, so can Mama!

18 Ways to Complicate Your Life

thesurvivalmom — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 10:07:00 +0000

In honor of Patrice Lewis’s book, The Simplicity Primer, and it’s formal debut on Tuesday, June 7, I offer an alternative: my “primer” to over-complicating your life. I have tried all these strategies and can vouch for their success.

1. Insist on a, “nice big spread” of food for every get-together. Be sure to drag out every recipe you’ve ever wanted to try, especially those with ingredients only available at a gourmet store some 23 miles away.

image by madmolecule

2. Wait until the night before a trip to pack. This is even more effective if you also wait to do ten loads of laundry in order for everyone to have clean underwear for the trip. In a pinch, make a quick trip to a 24-hour Walmart to buy new underwear.

3. Always say, “Yes!” After all, you would never want to disappoint someone in need of an emergency baby-sitter, a homemade dessert, or a substitute Sunday School teacher.

4. Set impossibly high goals, and when they aren’t achieved, just set the same goals all over again! Lose 15 pounds in two weeks? Sure! Why not!

5. When dishes come out of the dishwasher not-so-clean, put them right back in instead of washing them by hand. Food baked on during the drying cycle will become doubly baked-on the second time around, which is exactly why you pop them right back in for a third run. Third time’s the charm!

6. Always have at least half a dozen projects in motion. A knitting project, photo organizing, receipt filing, and multiple partially read books just add to the excitement. The more, the merrier!

7. Yell. It’s common knowledge that kids obey instantly when mom yells at them from the other end of the house.

8. Play before work. Be sure to pass this philosophy on to your kids.

image by jasminejennyjen

9. Ignore “Last Notice” bills from the water company. When the City finally comes to turn off the water, the family gets a fun, impromptu mini-vacation at the nearest hotel. If you can find everyone’s swimsuits, you can enjoy the pool!

10. Decide at the last minute, say 6 p.m. or so, what to make for dinner. This almost always necessitates a hurried trip to the grocery store to pick up a few ingredients not in your pantry. Trust me. It’s a great way to make sure the family is good and hungry when dinner is finally served!

11. Ignore little symptoms. Wait until they get really, really serious before making that appointment with the doctor or dentist.

12. Spend some $350 on a set of 11 different skin care products that are guaranteed to produce youthful results but must be used in a certain order, on certain days of the week. Add the two serums for overall body use, along with a battery powered scrub brush, you’ll experience the full meaning of, “high maintenance woman.”

13. Check out the maximum number of books the library allows. Sit back and enjoy watching the kids take the books on car rides, to doctor appointments, and to Grandma’s for overnight visits. Tracking down each book is a great way for the family to bond at 5 p.m the day they’re all due!

14. Own one pair of scissors.

15. Rigidly adhere to expectations and schedules. Refuse to accept any deviation, and when something goes wrong, pitch a fit.

16. Magazines! Subscribe to several, and have more than one location for them as they stack up. Remember, the “secret to life”, just might be in one of these issues, and you’d hate to miss it. Have your (only) pair of scissors handy when you do get time to leaf through them, and clip several articles and coupons from each one. This will result in the need for a complicated filing system. It’s a win-win all the way around.

Could happen. Image by MelvinSchlubman

17. Develop a make-up routine so you’ll always look your best. It should include a foundation for your foundation, the actual foundation, a foundation for your eye-shadow, and the eye-shadow itself. A single eye-shadow color isn’t enough. Your routine should have a color for the inner lid, a different color for the outer lid, a lighter shade for under the brow, and a deeper shade for the crease. Your eyes will need a liner, a mascara ‘base’, and then the mascara, but be sure to use an eyelash curler first. Don’t forget the lip foundation, the lipstick, and then the gloss. Before rushing out the door, pat a bit of powder on the shiny, and now-sweaty, parts of your face for a beautiful matte finish.

18. Store toilet paper at the other end of the house, and then yell when you’re stuck in the bathroom and need a new roll. (See #8.)

P.S. It was scary how easy it was to write this list!

Why I do this

thesurvivalmom — Sun, 22 May 2011 10:25:19 +0000

Guest post by Liz Long

I can’t control whether or when the government decides to pass laws that do things like make light bulbs cost $50, interfere with my Second Amendment rights (we visit DC, which is very anti-gun), print more money, or any of the hundreds of other ways they can and do make our lives more difficult.

I can’t control how business goes for my husband’s employer. There isn’t really much any of us can do to ensure our family continues to have a paycheck coming in.

I am a stay at home mom. I can and am trying to find work I can do virtually, including writing and blogging (about civics and American history, not prepping related), to bring in money but I have no idea how successful they will be, and my kids definitely affect my ability to actually do it, which is why the blog isn’t actually launched yet.

I can’t control much of my children’s schedules (when homework increases or a special project pops up), or when anyone gets sick or injured. I can’t control the weather or disasters, man-made or natural. I can’t control the price of oil or gasoline.

I can, however, buy groceries when I see them on sale and stock up so that I don’t have to run out for food when someone gets sick on grocery-shopping day or a big school project sucks up too much time and I can’t get out. I can start gardening so I have fresh vegetables and herbs to encourage my family to actually eat them. I can add a few things every time I go to the pharmacy so that whenever any of us get hurt, we have bandages, splints, elastic bandages, anti-bacterial creams, etc. when we need them. I can stock up on medicine so even if both my children get fevers within a week of each other that only goes down with Advil AND Tylenol every few hours, I don’t run out. And I can buy shoes and clothing when I find them on sale so when my children have a growth spurt, they have shoes and clothing to wear and I don’t have to race out to find something – anything! – they can wear to school.

Besides, I love gadgets and it’s a great excuse for some cool new gadgets, like my Cobb Grill and Sun Oven.

These are things I can control and I can do to protect my family in a world where so many things are beyond my control, particularly as a stay at home mom with a child in public school. Each can of soup, every box of bandages, every pair of socks to be grown into is a small step, but all of them taken together can lead to security for my family.

Give me your poor, your tired, exhausted moms…Have I got a book for you!

thesurvivalmom — Sat, 21 May 2011 23:18:38 +0000

image by thealieness GiselaGiardino

My life is so complicated sometimes. Is yours? There’s (always) laundry to do, and a steady stream of various messes in need of a cleaning. Cats and dogs that need to be fed and cuddled, cars that need oil changes, and maybe if my family is lucky, a hot dinner to be made. Have women’s lives always been this busy or is it unique to the modern age? Either way, it doesn’t take a village to raise a kid, but a mom could sure use a village to help her get through the day!

Patrice Lewis’s new book The Simplicity Primer isn’t quite a village but it sure feels like advice passed down from a whole passel of elders who want to make the lives of their women easier and more simple. Patrice and her family live on a 20 acre homestead in Idaho, and over the years, Patrice has discovered strategies that have simplified her life. She has written 365 of these in an easy and fun to read 395 page book. You can read one of her ideas each day for a year, but if you’re like me, you’re going to sit down and read page after page.

I loved her idea #99, “Listen to that still, small voice.” How many mistakes could you have avoided in life if you had trusted your gut instead of ignoring it and plowing on ahead? She tells of a time when her gut said, “Get out of here!”, and she did. To this day she isn’t sure why, but too many women ignore their instinct only to find themselves in a difficult or dangerous situation.

Idea #200 suggests, “Make a list, check it twice,” but it isn’t the type of list you might think. Instead, Patrice suggests keeping a list of any product that you think you absolutely must have. Write down the item, price, style, and location. Keep a list, and later, see if you still really need or want the item. If we taught our daughters that single tip, it could help them avoid credit card debt and enjoy a life free of financial burden.

All of Patrice’s ideas are practical, and they made me want to implement them immediately. “Pick your housekeeping battles,”The Serenity Prayer,” “Good Guilt vs. Bad Guilt,”… I’m throwing these out at you to tempt you! Yes, you’ll enjoy every page, every bit of wisdom. I got to know Patrice a few months ago when she wrote an article for my blog. We exchanged several emails, and she was warm, fun, and wonderful to converse with. She’s managed to package, “the real Patrice” in The Simplicity Primer.”

Her book will be available on June 7, but you can pre-order it on Amazon for an incredible price of $10.20. No, I don’t get a commission. I just recognize a book that could help change the parts of my life that have been driving me crazy. I needed The Simplicity Primer. Come to think of it, maybe advice from a whole village would make matters work. Simple advice from one smart lady makes more sense!

Good News Friday!!

thesurvivalmom — Fri, 18 Mar 2011 10:02:32 +0000

image by Jessica Tam

Woo-Hoo! Besides the fact that the weekend is here, we all could use a big, fat dose of good news!

A joyful heart is good medicine.

Proverbs 17:22

What good news do you have to share? Here’s mine. My book is more than half done, and my editor and I have come up with a really good title (to be announced later!). My kids are healthy and my husband’s business is keeping him busy. I’ve been enjoying the hospitality of some relatives in beautiful northern California. Life is still good.

Now it’s your turn!